Because Christianity is bigger than Biblical manhood or Biblical womanhood (Blog of Retha Faurie)

You know how I sometimes speak in graphs and numbers? (Like here, here, and here.)

Sometimes, God speaks to me in that language too. (He speaks English to an English man and Spanish to a Spanish woman – it is great when He speaks a language even I can understand.)

I was crying over opportunities I lost, doors that closed last year and no door have been opening instead.

“Retha. When things still went well, how many students did you teach per week?” Usually about 6-8.

“For how many minutes a week?” Subtracting all the other things we did, like the time they spent praying, about 25 minutes.

“For how many weeks a year?” About half the weeks.

“Add it up.” That comes down to about 75-100 minutes in an average week.

“How many blog readers do you have?” I have [this many] blog visitors between my blogs1, but I won’t say all of them learn from the blogs. Some could just look for something they did not find, like looking for evidence of male headship, or looking to see if I had any new blog posts the past 3 days. But at a conservative estimate, if only a few of them actually learn from me, let us say perhaps at least 20 people a day spend 5 minutes learning, between my different blogs.

“Add it up.” That is about 100 minutes of teaching people get from my blogs in a day, or 700 minutes a week.

“When you were still a Sunday school teacher, how much time and prayer did you spend on Sunday school vs. your blogs?” Not sure. Much longer preparing lessons than blogging, perhaps 3 or 4 times as much prayers for Sunday school teaching as for my blog?

“You put in double as much effort where you got 1/8 of your results? And where did the doors close?” Uhhhmmm, the place where I spent the majority of my time and enjoyed about 1/8 of my results.
I gained time to… blog and write more? But, Lord, this past year, since losing the opportunity to teach in person, I actually blogged less.
“Use the talents you have. Use the open door you have. And stop focusing on what you lost.”

I am not entirely happy with this message. The great thing is: the perspective that my life lost meaning does not have to be true. If I spend my time right, it could gain meaning for many people. The Internet is an international open door. But together with losing the chance to teach in person, I also lost a church and a sense of community. I have a different church where I attend now, but I do not see it turning into real community soon. Walking without eye-to-eye community is a lonely road, and having Aspergers does not make solutions for loneliness any easier.
So, I want to ask my loyal readers a favor:

As my ministry is mostly online now, and my church does not read my blogs, I want my loyal egal readers to send a message here if:

<1) I write something that is harmful or untrue
2) You detect a wrong attitude in me.

I ask this to egalitarian Christians. If you believe I am wrong to proclaim mutual submission, or even worse, wrong to believe God exists, you are not the kind of person whose help I ask here. Non-egals could also comment on this blog, but they are not my primary advisors.
Thank you in advance.


1 My blogs:

I blog mainly at but also sometimes at and (the last one in Afrikaans).

Comments on: "Dear readers, please help to keep me on track" (4)

  1. (((hugs))), you are stronger than you think. God alone knows how strong you are, trust Him to guide you.

    I have learned a LOT from you. More than I can say. My ONE negative comment would be that you don’t write ENOUGH. I look forward to the email that contains another one of your post. As for you ‘time’, another way to look at that would be to take me for example. I spent hours and hours and hours reading your posts. When I first found your blog, I just had to go back and read everything. I enjoyed it that much. So count everyone who continues to read as also being a person who ‘catches up’ and goes back to read everything. It’s not like a ‘newbie’ should only count for first day they read and then going forward. If they follow you, then keep in mind that they probably gone back and read everything. Also your links. I follow them. YOU provided them. Another ministry on your part.

    I am nothing. I am a ‘nobody’ in this world. I am only a lonely, humble servant of Christ. And I believe you are also. You serve me with this blog. How can I serve you????

    God bless you,



    • Thank you, Dee!

      It is my goal to write more in the near future.

      (Tiny explanation: It is not just a first read that counts for blog stats. If you open 20 pages to re-read 20 articles, the blog stat records 20 hits.)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Retha! I just want you to know that I LOVE your blog! I check in on it quite often to see if there is anything that I have missed. You bring fresh perspective, and so much of the content of your blog is full of thoughts and ideas that are in my spirit as well. I know what you mean about the quest for finding real community. It has been a struggle of mine as well. I love God and His people and the lost; however, here where I live in the South, it is very difficult for a woman to find community in a church context if she doesn’t adhere to the strict comp. theology that is heavily endorsed. Keep doing what you are doing. Your work is very important. You are a part of what God is doing globally. I want to start blogging soon myself to join the conversation. Be encouraged and I will pray that we both find those deep connections that we all long for. Blessings:-)


  3. Retha, I also check your blog all the time and I get so much from your posts! I am really glad for your articles, I get encouraged every time I read one. (I guess that’s not really what you asked for is it? LOL) Thank you for putting time into your writing here. Blessings!


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