“A man’s world is focused outside the home in work and recreation. A women’s world is strongly focused within the home and on family… Men develop the evidence of their worthiness primarily from their jobs, being respected in business, profession or craft. Women, and especially homemakers, depend primarily on the romantic relationship with their husbands for ego support… the emotional content of a marriage is usually more important to women and why the little tokens of affection are appreciated more by wives, who obtain esteem from these expressions of love and generosity. Women need continual reassurance from their husband that they are loved, needed and valued. … men do not need this kind of reassurance from their wives…
Men do not have as strong a desire and need for stability, security and enduring relationships as women do… Women are usually credited with possessing “mothers intuition” in regard to not just her children but all personal relationships. She may not be able to explain it, but she has a feeling about the situation that the man does not.” – From a piece of bad pop science masquerading as religious teaching on an allegedly Bible-oriented website.
This is a statement that often appear in teachings on gender roles: Men find value in work, women in relationships. Men want to be away from home, women want to be at home.
That is really weird. You see, for a newly wed wife with a husband at work her home is the one place where there are no people to relate to most of the time. Even if he works just 8 hours a day, with a 30 minutes lunch break and 30 minutes to get to work and later 30 minutes to get back, the waking hours with him at home are less than the hours alone.
If she is made to stay at home, and all her potential friends do the same, she can relate to nobody except the occasional plumber or delivery guy, who visits her home in the course of working. And she has to cook, clean, and do other kinds of work even though she don’t find value or pride in her work – unlike men, her self esteem is not influenced by how well she does her work, or the respect others give to it.
A woman is made for relating, so this story goes, and the young mother would want to stay at home and relate to nobody except her baby(/ies)/ toddler(s). She loves relating, so she will not miss adult relationships if she is at home all day.
The woman with grown up children who left the home will be happy alone (her friends would not want to visit – they will prefer being at home too) at home all day, as relationships are important to her.
Men, meanwhile, to whom relationships are not as important, should go to work where most of them relate to co-workers/ customers/ suppliers/ bosses/ employees all day.
And because men don’t need those little tokens of affection as much as women do, women was made by God to complement men by relating to them – relating means giving a lot of little tokens of affection that God did not design men to need, while men was designed by God to not find relating easily and therefore struggle to give little tokens of affection which God made women to need.
The mind boggles. (Oh, I am a woman and not, by their standards, driven by reason but by emotions. So perhaps I should rather say I feel confused by this?)